Submission Letter, by Em Dick-in-Son

The poem for which this submission letter was written.

So, this is me Maddie Albrecht submitting a poem. But if published, I'd like it to be under the name Em Dick-In-Son. 

Without intending to, I have been amassing a body of work that focuses on the utter shit-show of mainstream feminism (not even necessarily just feminism. To use a disgusting phrase, gender relations in general) and how I feel both defined and confined by it at times. Not in some regurgitated way. I mostly wish girls and guys, alike, would uh stop acting like virgin robots? My poems are an attempt to work through my frustrations but also take the piss out of myself and my often holier-than-thou reactions to what I see, hear, swallow, etc. Nobody likes a truly cynical bitch. But nobody likes an optimistic one either. So I aim for the middle. Maybe my perspective has something to do with the fact that the first porn I ever watched was "DOM DADDY PROFESSOR PUNISHES BAD GIRL TEEN SLUT STUDENT FOR SKIPPING CLASS XX" or something to that effect. Not sure. Still waiting to figure that one out.